The last time I wrote, I opened up about my mental health in a way I’ve never really done before. To be completely honest, it was a very freeing thing to do; being so open and candid about how I feel felt really great. It took this weight off my chest that I’d been struggling with for so long. It also has given me the chance to open a whole new dialogue that I’ve been itching to explore, but that I wasn’t quite sure how to approach.
The concept of self-love is one that I’ve wanted to talk about basically since I started writing this blog, but I was never entirely sure how to approach the topic since I’ve struggled with the concept personally for so long. Opening up a couple weeks ago about my “bad brain days” has kind of pushed me to consider my “self love journey” and the concept as a whole. As a result, I think I’ve finally figured out how I can approach the subject.
I’m still quite a long ways from full on loving myself, but I’m starting on that journey and, as a result, I’ve decided to kind of chronicle my endeavours. I’m going to kind of track and record my progress on here, and share my experiences, my lessons and my achievements with all you lovely people reading. It’s definitely not going to be an easy task – that journey self-acceptance and self-love is never an easy one – but I’m looking forward to the challenge and to all the good that will come from it.
Today, I’ve decided to start my self-love journey with a little tag. I found this particular tag on Hello, Steph (which is an incredible blog that I highly recommend you check out and show some love to whenever you get the chance) and I immediately knew that it was kind of a perfect follow up to last week’s piece. I think it’s a great introduction to the topic of self-love, and it was a fun little piece to put together. I hope you enjoy it!
1. What is something that is getting you down at the moment?
I’m gonna be completely honest with you: there are a lot of things that are currently getting me down. The fact that I move in literally a week, the fact that my friends and I are gonna so far apart, the fact that I can’t seem to shake those pesky bad brain days – they’re all things that are kind of getting me down right now.
2. What is something that makes you happy?
There are a lot of things that make me happy, to be honest (and if you’re curious, I’ve written two posts in the past all about the things that make me happy, which you can find here and here, if you’re curious). At the present moment, I guess the thing that is actively making me happiest is probably Star Trek. I’m nearly finished the original series (*immediately starts crying at the thought*) and I’ve really been enjoying it. Amidst whatever it is that’s happening in my brain, and all the stuff that’s happening in the world, Star Trek serves as a really great escape and just makes me feel good. I’m very excited to start The Next Generation, probably some time this week.
3. Name 3 guilty pleasures.
I just want to clarify that I personally detest the term “guilty pleasure”. In my opinion, you should never feel guilty about something that makes you happy, or that makes you feel good. Embrace the joy that that thing brings to you. Please don’t feel guilty about any of them! Anyways, to answers the actual question…
1) Chocolate. I have a major weakness for chocolate. Any will-power I have goes out the window the second I find out there is chocolate in my house.
2) Online window shopping. I spend way too much time on sites like Boohoo and Anthropologie for my own good, looking at all the things I definetely can’t afford.
3) Ghost Whisperer. I used to be obsessed with this show back when it was airing, and I swear that any time I see reruns being played, I will drop everything to sit down and watch the show. Melinda and Jim were my original relationship goals #sorrynotsorry
4. What is something about yourself that you would like to improve on?
If I’m completely honest, there are a lot of things about myself that I’d like to improve on. I’d like to be more active and to eat healthier (things I’ve slowly been working towards), I’d like to be quieter and listen more closely to what’s going on around me, I’d like to be more present and to actively participate in the moment more, etc.
If I had to choose one single thing that I’d like to improve on, though, I’d probably have to say that I wish I was a better friend. As hard as I try to be the best friend I can possibly be, I know that sometimes I fall short. I know that sometimes I’m still too wrapped up in myself. I know that sometimes I don’t say what my friends need to hear. I know that sometimes, even though I try to give every single one of my friendships 110%, sometimes I fall short, and it’s something I’d really like to be better at. I’d really like to be a better friend.
5. When was the last time you belly laughed?
Probably on Friday. One of my good friends came over, and she and I were just talking, and she’s one of those people that just constantly makes me laugh and smile.
6. What is your biggest insecurity and fear?
As much as I hate to admit it, I’m scared of being alone. I’m scared of my friends moving on, and all of us losing touch. I’m scared of not having the people I love and rely on being there when I need them. I’m scared of being alone.
7. Name a song that always cheers you up when you’re down.
Come on Eileen by Dexy’s Midnight Runners is probably my go-to pick-me-up song every time. Every time I hear it, I think of the scene from The Perks of being a Wallflower, where Sam and Patrick perform “the livingroom routine” at the school dance. It just makes me so happy. Step by Step by New Kids on the Block is another one that never ceases to make me get up and dance, regardless of how down I might be feeling.
8. Name 3 things you like about yourself.
1) My eyes. I really believe that saying, “The eyes are the windows to the soul”, and I think you can tell a lot about a person’s feelings and thoughts by looking in their eyes. I like to think my eyes always convey what I’m feeling inside.
2) My baking skills are pretty good, if I do say so myself. I make a mean triple chocolate cookie when I want to.
3) How excited I get about even the littlest of things. I love feeling that rush of excitment that kind of floods my system when I learn a new fact about my favourite show, or when my favourite auther is putting out a new book, or something like that.
9. What is an achievement that has made you proud of yourself this year?
An achievement that made me feel really good about myself so far this year was receiving a Medal of Merit at graduation for Citizenship, Character and Faculty Endorsement. That moment made me feel like I’d done some good, and that people had recognized how much work I put into everything I did. It was really validating.
10. Tell us your happiest memory.
There was this one afternoon, years and years ago, when my dad and I were both hungry. My dad didn’t really feel like making anything, and I was still a little too young to try and make anything myself, so we decided to get in the car and get something. My dad drove to this one little grocery store downtown, and we went inside to the ready-to-go meals area, and we picked up some fried chicken and french fries, and then we went back outside to our car. My dad opened up the back (the trunk) and we just sat down in the trunk and had a picnic in the parking lot. That’s one of my favourite childhood memories, and one of my favourite memories of my dad.
I hope you’ve all had a lovely past few weeks. I’m sorry I didn’t write last week, but I decided to extend my vacation just a little bit longer. That doesn’t mean I wasn’t working, though! I have lots of exciting new content coming your way in the next few weeks, and I’m very excited to share all of it with you lovely lot, so please keep and eye on this space.
I hope you all have a great week, and that you enjoy these final summer days before getting back into the routine of school and real life. I can’t wait to see you right back here next week. Until then, much love 🙂